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There There

from Anodyne (EP) by Alexander Dove

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about

This song has a story behind it. Not behind its content, but behind its writing.
See, at the small liberal arts college I was then attending, in a little town on one of the largest hills in flat-ass Iowa, I had a lot of trouble working on songs because my room was always full of people. So when I had music for this song, and lyrics burning a hole in my brain, I went for a long walk to write it at about 11:30 PM, because my room was still full of people playing video games. This was in February and the steep hills of the college and town were covered with ice, so walking was a pleasant adventure.
I kept walking until college, then town, stopped happening around me, and I found that just outside of town was an old cemetery, so I went in and walked around. I found a tiny gravestone around midnight that had no name, only the word "Mother," and I found that moving. If it hadn't been midnight, I think I would have called my mom and told her I loved her. I left the cemetery and continued following the same road as it began to curve dramatically.
I could hear the train whistle. When I first arrived at college six months earlier I noticed the train whistle all the time, but I felt like I hadn't heard it in months. It had faded into the background but I was very aware of things that night. A college-age student was coming down the road the opposite way, even though there was nothing out there to be coming from. He was smoking a cigarette. He looked at me as we passed each other.
"Hey," he said. "Do I know you?"
"Don't think so," I said.
"You want a hug?" he asked.
I paused.
"Sure."
We hugged and went our separate ways. Shortly after this, the words that had been stewing in my head finished settling, and just then I came to a bench under a solitary light, and sat down and wrote. I assume some sort of bus made a habit of stopping there, but I have no idea why it would. It seemed providential at the time. When I had scrawled out all the lyrics on my little notepad with my freezing hands, I turned around and walked back over the icy hills to my dorm room, and since it was past 2 AM, my friends had finally gone to bed.
The next day I told them the whole story, and they could not understand how this chain of events could happen to someone who wasn't high.
But I'm a little strange, which is sort of like being high.

lyrics

Your glowing glance went through me like a burning lance of snow;
I was looking in your brown eyes for salvation.
For your eyes reflected sunset, and I thought that in their glow
I could reach out to the flame of revelation.

And what then did I seek beneath the whirlwind of your hair?
The end of all hatred and care.
There, there.

I chased you from the sunset to the first red wound of dawn
and your hair hung down behind you like a shackle,
but the dawn's first darting rays betray each doe to be a fawn,
and before its bloody gaze I am a jackal.

And what then did I find beneath the whirlwind of your hair?
The secret design of despair.
There, there.

I stagger and I stumble groping upward on the ice,
merely waiting for the sunrise to undo me,
and I spread my arms embracing in a bootless sacrifice,
knowing nothing in creation would renew me.

And what now do I see beneath the whirlwind of your hair?
A burn that no balm can repair.
There, there, there.

credits

from Anodyne (EP), released June 2, 2011

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Alexander Dove Chicago, Illinois

Alexander Dove is a songwriter, poet, and composer, who also plays in the traditional Celtic folk group Dòrain. Alexander Dove is used for more-or-less solo or self-directed work, regardless of genre. Published writings are under the name Alexander Dove Lempke. ... more

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